Taking a Break!
If there was ever a perfect example of how wrong taking a break from a relationship can go, it is the (in)famous Friends episode in which Rachel finds out Ross had a fling with a copy place clerk. As you would soon find out from reading the very same articles I’ve read, asking your partner for a break entails much more than meets the eye. Well established and clear rules, meeting dates and contact regulations seem to be the only way to go through a successful relationship break.
Though asking for a relationship break might seem a tough chore, being asked for it could prove to be the rougher end. When you have long thought over and over about asking your significant other for a little time apart, consider the other party has not had time to think this situation through and will, at first, feel shocked, betrayed and absolutely destroyed. Since more relationships than non end up breaking up under the excuse of a break, it is only expected the unsuspecting party to react defensively and hurt. Therefore, if breaking the news will not be something your partner could somewhat get a hint on, be very delicate and smooth.
Breaks more often than not come from a number of situations that take place within a couple. Not that only one of these solely affects lovebirds, but most likely one will hit the nail on the head regarding your reasons for asking for a break. Most people who find themselves asking for a break have fallen out of love with their significant other (after all, honeymoon chemistry only lasts so long), they have fallen in love with someone else , or the relationship is moving at a pace faster or slower than you expected it to.
As most couples eventually find out, the honeymooner experience as intoxicating as it can be is soon over and leaves couples exposed to each other’s reality. Your likes and dislikes of that other person might have been masked by blinding love at first sight, or plain raw passion. As the raging hormones and chemicals drop their intensity levels, people quickly realize there might be little in common with the other person or character quirks they were willing to put up with no longer make the cut.
As sad as giving your relationship a break may be, consider this time apart might be able to provide both of you with some perspective to rethink your behavior and decisions. While you could have been sure of something being in the relationship, more often than not couples realize what they have lost after spending some time apart. Getting back together can happen. Yet, some ground rules are certainly necessary.
First and foremost establish for how long will the two of you be separated. Be it a week or a month, make sure it is enough time for you to accomplish your end goal: catch a new breath or have the other person reconsider their priorities. Once time has been set, make clear the level of communication you two will be allowed to have. Most people believe total loss of communication is best in order to accomplish true separation. If you are the one asking for the break, be firm about this point; otherwise, there really is no point to doing this. Last but not least, agree in advance to whether or not you’ll be able to see other people. If your break is a means to strengthen the relationship, it would be adviceable not to. However, there are some people who allow such a situation and suddenly you are using a spare generic Viagra to park inside a different garage. Chances are the second bunch won’t get back together with their partners.
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